FatherRon.com

Many of you have seen the show TV Bloopers, they are hilarious.
I have read about newspaper bloopers, how one word can change so
much. I would like to share with you some parish bulletin bloopers. I
think they are great!
 Don’t let worry kill you – Let the Church help.
 Thursday Night – Potluck supper. Prayer and medication to
follow.
 Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church and
community.
 This afternoon there will be a meeting in the South and North ends
of the church. Children will be baptized at both ends.
 This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Lewis to come forward
and lay an egg on the altar.
 The service will close with “Little Drops of Water.” The cantor
will start quietly and the rest of the congregation will join in.
2 Next Sunday a special collection will be taken to defray the cost of
the new carpet. All those wishing to do something on the new
carpet will come forward and do so.
 The ladies of the church have cast off clothing of every kind. They
can be seen in the church basement Saturday.
 A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall.
Music will follow.
 At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be “What is
Hell?” Come early and listen to our choir practice.
I started my homily this week with these because I have
experienced so many people stressed, anxious, grumpy, mostly over
getting ready for Christmas. This Sunday (formerly called Guadete
Sunday – Rejoice) with its pink candle reminds us that no matter how
dark it might be in our lives, that no matter how anxious or grumpy we
might feel, for whatever reason, no matter how depressing the world
situation might be – the light, the joy of God will never leave us. We
need to hold on to this Good News and we need to rejoice today. We
need to smile – we need to laugh – right in the face of hard times.
Maybe this will help:
The late great humorist, Erma Bombeck, told the story of what
happened to her in Church one Sunday…
“I was intent on a small child who was turning around and smiling
at everyone. He wasn’t gurgling, spitting, humming, kicking, tearing the
hymnals, or rummaging through his mother’s handbag. He was just
smiling.
“Finally, his mother jerked him about and in a stage whisper that
could be heard in a littler theater off Broadway said, ‘Stop that Grinning!
You’re in Church!’ With that, she gave him a belt and, as the tears
rolled down his cheek, she added, ‘That’s better,’ and returned to her
prayers. We sing, ‘Make a joyful noise unto the Lord!’ while our faces
reflect the sadness of one who has just buried a rich Aunt who left
everything to her pregnant hamster.
“Suddenly I was angry. It occurred to me the entire world is in
tears, and if you’re not, then you’d better get with it. I wanted to grab
this child with the tear-stained face close to me and tell him about My
God. The happy God. The smiling God. The God who had to have a
sense of humor to have created the likes of us. I wanted to tell him he is
an understanding God. One who understands little children who turn
around and smile in church, and even curious little children who
rummage through their mothers’ handbags. I wanted to tell that little
child that I too have taken a few lumps for daring to smile in an
otherwise solemn religious setting.
“By tradition, I suppose, one wears Faith with the solemnity of a
mourner, the mask of tragedy. What a fool, I thought, this woman
sitting next to the only sign of hope – the only miracle – left in our
civilization. If that child couldn’t smile in church, where was there left
to go?”
Let me close with this: There is an organization of business people
who donate their time visiting hospitals – especially children’s hospitals.
They go to these hospitals as working “Clowns” – here is a portion of
their special prayer:
“Lord, as I stumble through this life, help me to create more
laughter than tears, dispense more happiness than gloom, spread more cheer than despair. Never let me grow so big that I will fail to see the
wonder in the eyes of a child, or the twinkle in the eyes of the aged.
Never let me forget that I am a clown, that my work is to cheer people
up, make them happy, and make them laugh. And in my final moment,
may I hear you whisper, ‘When you made my people smile, you made
me smile!’”
Finally, when you are going over your gift list, don’t forget these
gifts:
1. The gift of laughter
2. The gift of a smile
3. The gift of joy brought on by a phone call, card, or a short
visit
4. A sense of healthy humor
5. Giving a gift to ourselves – not to take ourselves too
seriously.
With that in mind, what do you get when you cross a praying
mantis with a termite? – A bug that says grace before it eats your house.
Thank you. (REJOICE)